squelching rumors at work

[bigmamamedic1]

How do you stop rumors from going around at work? A friend of mine has been accused of "you guess it" and I don't think it is going on. Yet my name as well as another individual has been brought into problem.
How do you clear it>

[NCRSQ751]

I wish I had a good answer for you, but after 13+ years I still haven't figured that one out.

I stopped counting the number of rumors that have started about me or other women. We seem to be big topics and to be honest a lot of the rumors come from other women (wives, girlfriends...) that suspect you are doing things they are afraid of.

I have never figured a way of stopping it so frankly, I ignore it. I don't give them the satisfaction of getting upset about it or letting it interfere with what I'm here for.

If people really have nothing better to do, that's their problem.

If you are in a position where it is a matter of discipline or someone's job you'll have to do something - the truth is your best shield.

My advice would be again not to get upset or let them get you mad. Just stick to the truth and don't waver. The point of rumor mongers is to cause as big a stir/mess as possible. If they don't get it they'll eventually slither away.

------------------
Susan Bednar
Captain - Forsyth Rescue
North Carolina Strike Force 1

[NC]

I can definitely relate to your friend. I recently joined my local volunteer fire department. Before I was even sworn in, one of the senior members, an officer, spread the rumor that we were sleeping together, you can imagine how angry I was. I told one of the other officers that this happened, her response- anyone who actually believes the story is more of an idiot than he is. He by the way, is about 20 years older than I am and forgets to take showers or wear deoderant. GROSS!!!!

[SRVFD2]

My motto has always been "My friends know better, and why should I really care what anyone else says!!"

[csgos]

To bigmamamedic1:

Yes, you do have a problem. Rumor mills will spring up in the fire service when you least expect it. Been there and done that.

You ask how to solve a problem. You have a problem, because your character and reputation are being called into question.
My response would be, as I tell anyone else, is to tell the truth on the matter, if so involved. I say this that once you tell a lie, you must create lies constantly to cover up the first lie. Let the truth stand alone, because it will. Rumors of the types involving you could be very detrimental. Personally you should hit it head on. Next time you overhear the rumor, tell the ones repeating it your side of the story.

For consideration, are the rumors of your involvement accurate. What does your CO
think or know? Rumors like this could be grounds for harrassment, if the rumors are not true about your involvement

As I look over this forum, NCRSQ751 has the best response so far, including mine. However, there is so much a person, man or woman can take.

[mrsfirefighter]

There doesn't seem to be much you can do about the rumor mill...especially when the top dogs are usually the driving force. It's in our policy that malicious gossip/rumors about fire dept. personnel are grounds for termination, but nothing was done when the rumor was about me. I even had several people come forward and report who had started it. All because I needed to pick up my gear from a station off duty and called ahead to see if anyone needed anything. Then I hung out and talked shop for a while.

Rumors are the main problem I've had to deal with in the fireservice. I'm very close whith the guys on my shift and many others. We all spend a lot of off duty time together. It's not a problem with any of our significant others, but other people always have to make some comment. It's a bummer that I'm lucky enough to be treated as "one of the guys" and others try to make it into something else.

[Pastor Dawn]

My first suggestion would be to confront the people doing the talking. Ask them why your name is being brought into the rumour mill. Do not ask about your friend!! She's a big girl and should take care of her own reputation; you worry about your own. if you are concerned enough about the slander to your good name, ask the personnel officer, chief officer or chaplain to speak to the offending indiviual(s) on your behalf. Honest, open confrontation usually stops most rumours.