The male chauvinist

[panther]

Okay ladies.....I think we can all agree we work in a male dominated field. But how have you come to deal with the male chauvinist that occasionally rears its ugly head? And what do you do when that person is your boss? I'm running out of ideas and could really use another perspective.

In advance, thanks!

[NCRSQ751]

I ignore them and I do my job. One of two things will eventually happen, they'll get over it and accept you or they won't. It's their problem, you can't make it yours. I'm not sure where you're from, but particularly here in the south there aren't all that many women in the fire service. We have one member in our FD that I found particularly challenging. He really felt women belonged at home barefoot & pregnant. I was as nice to him as the others, did my job, pulled my weight and I haven't had the first problem with him. Their main issue TENDS to be that they don't think you can do it - they think of you as a weak female that couldn't do for them what the guys can. Prove them wrong and the majority of them will come around. Some won't - but that's life. As long as they don't compromise your safety with their attitude - don't sweat it.

[captstanm1]

From a males perspective I think the Chief from NC is correct. however it has to be said that it is not true in all cases (all men are not against women in the service). But her advise is good.

My girlfriend is a firefighter/medic and she hangs in there with the best of them. She has 13 years on and hasgained thier respect. I am sure there was skepticism when she first got on but now they look to her for advice sometimes. She is one that should take the next step and become an officer.

Additionally, I have worked with female firefighters who could out-perform some of the males that worked for me. And they could do it without trying. They wanted to do the job for all the right reasons. They were respected and had no problems.

Good luck

[NCRSQ751]

captstanm1 - I didn't mean to give the impression that all men will be against women - although I guess it sounded that way. Trust me - two of my better male friends talked me into joining my FD and I'm set to marry another of them - so they certainly aren't all bad!

[captstanm1]

Chief,

I did not take it that way at all. Was actually in support of what you said. I understood....... I may be dumb...but I am not stupid!:D

[ember]

Hmmm

Truthfully...it's really hard. I think the worst for me was finding out that a person with whom I had gone to emt and fire school, and who was a friend, was a chauvanist. He really tried not to be, but he was already set in his ways. It turns out that the whole time we were in fire school he had been telling everyone that women didn't belong! We ended up parting freinds, but parting nonetheless.

It's definately hardest in the firehouse though...there have been times when guys who have only been on months have been allowed to step-up to engineer over me in my own station. It's frustrating. But I truly believe that these guys don't do it intentionally. I think it's an attitute that they have cultivated for years, and may not even realize it. So.. I have to prove to them that I am capable. And yes, I have to give 120% when the guys can get away with 80%. I always try to be the first one in and the last one out. And sometimes, I am ready to give up. But there is always a light at the end of the tunnel, and perseverance does pay off. Even if this guy doesn't notice what you've done, or what you do, others will.


Ember

[jimthefireman]

Panther are you talking about the usual skepticism and maybe ignorance or is this guy taking serious liberties? For the first I think the others are spot on. Work hard and don't sweat the small stuff but if he is seriously overstepping the mark you may need to take things further. If you do need to make a complaint remember it is only worth doing if you are going to make it stick so get all your ducks in a row first. Record times, dates witnesses present and keep it all tucked away for when you might need it. There is nothing more frustrating than trying to prove something was the last straw when there is no "evidence" of the problem ever previously occuring. Hopefully that day will never come and your own ability and dedication will recieve the recognition it deserves. Good luck

[ramseycl]

I think that I have lucked out with my department. They have been very understanding and welcoming from the beginning. I had been around the department for years before I joined. Of course there were a few people who were sceptic of a woman backing them up. I signed up for the firefighter one class, and when I finished at the top of the class I had earned a lot more respect. Most men are very easy to work with once you prove to them that you are not there to screw around and that you are willing to work.
If there truly is a problem with one of your coworkers the best thing that you can do is document it. You are going to have a hard time proving anything with out some dates and times.

[188Vollie]

Panther, in my 7+ years of being a FF, I have found that the best way for women in the FD to succeed is to not let the chauvinists get to you, or at least don't let them know they are getting to you. Also, pull your own weight and the "real men" will eventually learn to respect you. If not, more than likely the problem is with them. I've also found that some men, especially ones that are older and bigger, (not necessarily more experienced or better) can be some of your toughest challenges. They don't want to be bossed by someone younger than them or smaller than them, especially if that person is a she. Sometimes, after women have been in for a while, it also seems that some of the men are intimidated by her. It's almost like they are afraid to be "shown up".

[Squirt74Fire]

Male chauvinist?... what's that?... j/k... I definately have some of them in my department. Myself being in for two-and-a-half years now... they don't really bother me much anymore. But boy did they used to. It always seemed like I couldn't do anything right for them... and that what I did was never enough for them. Until one night my Asst. Chief and I talked about it. I will always remember what he said... he told me "We would never ask you to do anything that we didn't know you're capable of doing. As far as you feeling that you're not doing anything good enough for them, as long as you did one thing, even go get a tool off the truck and give it to someone to use, you still helped, and that's what you're here to do." Thanks Rick. Things for me have definately been better for me since that little talk with the Asst. All you have to do is believe in yourself and know that you aren't inferrior to the ones that think you are. Go out there, do your job, and be pleased with yourself. Don't respond to them and they will leave you alone eventually. Trust me. Have a great day everyone and good luck. ;)

[George M Jacobs]

All right
First thing first, you need the know the differences between being pick on becouse you are a female. Or is it becouse you are a roockie? All roockies catch the devil the first year on the job. but if its becouse you are a female then to go after someones job expecially a brother or sister fire fighter is just wrong, and should be the last resort. If you do, you will destory all the comaraderie you ever hopt to have in the fire house. You need to address this problem head on with the person. That part of being a professional. I have worked in the fire service for over 26 years, and am a 3ed generation fire fighter. I now hold the title of Division Chief, with 5 station under my command. This is just to let you know, i have been around and seen a lot.Im not blowing my own horn, I truly do care that you are not treated with the respect you deserve. The question that need to be ask of the fire fighter who you feel is belittling you is this. And you do need to ask him. If his daughter was to work here are a diffrent fire department, how would you want her treated? And one thing for sure in the fire service is, respect is not given it is earned.

Take care, Be safe & Good luck

[lutan1]

Document it, document it, document it!

Give yourself as much ammunition as possible for when he over steps the mark in your eyes and you decide to take it further....
:mad:

[George M Jacobs]

Chauvinist or Uneasy
Some male fire fighters look a a female fire fighter as competition for advancement based on gender alone. This is the result of departments in the past promoting females based on their gender, and it has happened. I place a lot of emphasis on in the past, so please dont take this wrong. In retrospect in the past there has been a lot of males promoted base on the good old boy system, neather is right. What is of a great concern to me is all the Brothers & Sisters who want to burn somone on this page. The best advise is to face this problem head on, confront the one who you are having the conflict with. Give that person the chanch to make his or her corrective action. Tell the person that what he or she is doing is hurts you,and your not going to put up with it. Have a one on one with them, and dont keep it a secret from the othe fire fighters in the station, that you are going to work this out. And when you are in there, dont hold any thing back. Be strong and stand firm, let them know it ends here and it ends today. If you would like have a 3ed person set in to help keep things in prospective.(not to take a side) You have a career of between 20 to 25 years to work, as a team. We are all brothers and sisters in this job. We can hard ball each other, but no one else can. And I for one am tired of hearing,"Can you drag me out of a house if im down". There not a fire fighter in the world, that would leave a brother or sister behind. That statement makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up.

YBIC
Take care