1. #1
    MembersZone Subscriber
    MalahatTwo7's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Loco madidus effercio in rutilus effercio.

    Default No Nursing Home For Me (Too Good to Waste on Joke thread)

    No nursing home for me

    There will be no nursing home in my future.........
    When I get old and feeble, I am going to get on a Princess Cruise Ship.
    average cost for a nursing home is $200 per day. I have checked on
    reservations at Princess and I can get a long term discount and senior
    discount price starting @ $135 per day. That leaves $65 a day for:
    1. Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.
    2. I will have as many as 10 meals a day if I can waddle to the
    restaurant, or I can have room service ( which means I can have
    breakfast in bed every day of the week).
    3. Princess has as many as three swimming pools, a workout room, free
    washers and dryers, and shows every night.
    4. They have free toothpaste and razors, and free soap and shampoo.
    5. They will even treat you like a customer, not a patient. An extra
    $5 worth of tips will have the entire staff scrambling to help you.
    6. I will get to meet new people every 7 or 14 days.
    7. TV. broken? Light bulb need hanging? Need to have mattress replaced?
    No Problem! They will fix everything and apologize for your
    8. Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don't even have to ask
    for them.
    9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip you are on Medicare.
    If you fall and break a hip on the Princess ship they will upgrade
    you to a suite for the rest of your life.
    10. Frequent opportunity to shoot clay pigeons off the fantail if one
    can still hoist the shotgun; nice guns too.

    Now hold on for the best! Do you want to see South America, the
    Panama Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia, or name where you
    want to go? Princess will have a ship ready to go. So don't look for
    me in a nursing home, just call shore to ship. I'll email you my number
    after I board.
    I'll be on the upper-deck by the pool with Margarita.

    P.S. And don't forget, when you die, they just dump you over the side
    at no charge.


    For Reservations: 1-800-421-0522

    For a sailor guy like me, this sounds perty darn good!

  2. #2
    Forum Member
    firecat1's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Betwixt here and there.


    THAT sounds like a plan!!!

  3. #3

    Join Date
    Jan 2008


    Well Nursing Homes charge that much because that is what the government says they should get. Take away government subsidies and the cost will drop; this is proof.

  4. #4
    Forum Member

    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Memphis Tn,USA-now


    And I thought I had a good deal in Uncle's yacht club:Three hots and a cot but no guarantees I'd ever see either.Payday every two weeks,liberty whenever the work was all done.
    That and I had to salute officers but you can't have everything.

  5. #5
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    EastKyFF's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Nippa, KY


    Quote Originally Posted by ScareCrow57 View Post
    Well Nursing Homes charge that much because that is what the government says they should get. Take away government subsidies and the cost will drop; this is proof.
    Great. Now even the jokes are getting politicized. Just laugh and go on with your life.
    I am more than just a serious basketball fan. I am a life-long addict. I was addicted from birth, in fact, because I was born in Kentucky.
    ― Hunter S. Thompson

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