A slightly different concern
I've read the thread about how worried some are about their spouse or loved one putting their lives on the line every day/shift/call.
Oddly enough, I'm not worried about my husband dying on a call at all. He is a strong, smart, brave man and once he's through the Academy, I know he will prove to be one of the best, physically. He was born to do this job, I know it is his calling (I knew it before he did).
Strangely, my issues lie within the psychological and emotional aspect. For both of us, actually. So far this winter, there has been what seems like a very large number of fire related deaths in Ohio (and Northern Kentucky, near where we used to live), and most of those deaths have been children. We have 2 little ones of our own, and when you add in my husbands future job and babies dying in fires.... I've been experiencing anxiety like I've never had before. I am NOT "that" kind of person! Why am I feeling this way?
I'm not afraid to lose my husband to a fire, or another job related death. But I am afraid to lose him other ways. Will he harden up? Will he become devoid of emotion? Will be become bored during his 48 hours home with us? Even worse... will he not feel anything at all when he does experience something bad? I only ask these because my husband is already emotionally stunted to begin with (I jest, but only a little). He has trouble showing sympathy and sharing empathy. I don't expect exact answers, because I know no one here knows him. But insight would be nice. Perspective would be greatly appreciated. :)
We've talked, and he's asked how much I want to know about his future job. I think I just want to know about the happy endings, or things he's excited about. Is it possible to separate knowing the good from the bad? Or should he share all, or nothing? Next friday there is going to be an open house, and we can meet a department psychologist. We're planning on going, but until then, any words of wisdom would really be appreciated.
Have a safe and happy weekend!