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Thread: is it me?

  1. #1
    Forum Member BurninLuv's Avatar
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    strange question i suppose but here goes

    i moved here like 2 yrs ago, and wanted to join the local vfd because i was a vfd mem at my previous loc (lived there 5 yrs) and i wanna help. i went to a mtg and they said come to 3 mtgs in a row so we know your serious abt it. Ok fine.

    ive been to 4 mtgs now, none lastd more than 20 mins, and no one spoke to me at all. after each mtg ended i went to the ff in chrge and gave my info so thy could call me and every time i got the 'yeah we'll call u right away u got experience wed luv to have you' but no call.

    i came to the frst mtg in March. its now almost Sept. nothing.

    i dunno what to do. just give up on this? are they tellin me no w/o sayin no to my face? advice plse!


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    Talk to the Chief.

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    it is either NO or they are just not with it???, and would you want to go to a fire with the attitude they have??

    have you done any training with them, or do they just meet talk and leave???????

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    Let's talk fire trucks! BoxAlarm187's Avatar
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    As was suggested, I'd talk to the Chief.

    Have you visited the station on non-meeting nights and gotten some face-time with the members?

    On the other hand, I from what you describe, I don't really know if this is a department that I'd have the warm-and-fuzzies about joining anyway.
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    You said after each meeting you talked to the FF in charge. Is that not the chief? Is the chief not at the meetings?

    If not, then I agree with the idea of talking with the chief. Just because a few of them may not be with it on meetings, don't mean they are telling you NO (and it don't mean they would be bad on a scene either). Give it another meeting or 2 and see what happens. If nothing changes, move on.

    Good luck.

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    Forum Member Bones42's Avatar
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    Company meetings are run by the company president. They are business meetings about the "business" of the company.

    Chiefs run the officers meeting. That is about tactics/policies/etc.

    You come to a chief meeting about membership, you'll be directed to the presidents.

    After 4 times of talking to the "ff in charge" and getting no response at all........Yes, it's you. Sorry, but that appears to be the case. Can't tell you why (as I don't know) but can wish you luck.
    "This thread is being closed as it is off-topic and not related to the fire industry." - Isn't that what the Off Duty forum was for?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bones42 View Post
    Company meetings are run by the company president. They are business meetings about the "business" of the company.

    Chiefs run the officers meeting. That is about tactics/policies/etc.

    You come to a chief meeting about membership, you'll be directed to the presidents.
    We have a BOD's and of course members. The chief is on the board. member meetings are held 1st and 3rd Wed of each month. Business meetings are held on a as needed.

    Chief is head of all member/training meetings, so he is always the "FF in charge".

    That's why it seemed odd what was said above. Interesting to learn how different departments work.


    BL, I would personally still talk with the chief. get a clear yes or no answer. IMO it is rude for them to leave you hanging like that.

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    Forum Member CaptOldTimer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BurninLuv View Post
    strange question i suppose but here goes

    i moved here like 2 yrs ago, and wanted to join the local vfd because i was a vfd mem at my previous loc (lived there 5 yrs) and i wanna help. i went to a mtg and they said come to 3 mtgs in a row so we know your serious abt it. Ok fine.

    ive been to 4 mtgs now, none lastd more than 20 mins, and no one spoke to me at all. after each mtg ended i went to the ff in chrge and gave my info so thy could call me and every time i got the 'yeah we'll call u right away u got experience wed luv to have you' but no call.

    i came to the frst mtg in March. its now almost Sept. nothing.

    i dunno what to do. just give up on this? are they tellin me no w/o sayin no to my face? advice plse!

    Just my thought, if you talk or write like you do on here, cell phone chatter, I can see why you may have a problem.

    If you are on a fd and have to write letters and reports it has to be where the reader can understand it and not having to guess it.

    If, I myself, was told to come to a meeting for 3 or 4 times to see if I was interested and I did and they didn't act like I would be wanted, I would not say anything, but leave and go elsewhere. I'm going to be treated like a red head step-child. There are too mnay other VFD's that if you have experience or not are always looking for fresh members.
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    Forum Member BurninLuv's Avatar
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    well that is what i was thinking. im surprised that any vfd would turn away ppl without even seeing what they know but whatever.

    every time i talked to the guy running the mtg, i guess hes in charge, he acts like it. hes the only one who wears a 'dept polo', every bdy else is in whatever.


    i only know abt the monthly mtg which i guess is like a business mtg, i dont know abt any other mtgs. i drive by the station pretty regular ( i get my gas on the other side at the gro and my church is that way also) and i nvr see it open or any one there except for these mnthly meetings.

    i guess it is me but i dont know why thy dont just say 'thanks but no thanks'. rather know up front than be told to come back time aftr time for no reason.

    thers another vfd but its like 6 miles away (this 1 is 1/2 a mile). guess i can check them out.

    thanks for the advice, very helpful guys!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bones42 View Post
    After 4 times of talking to the "ff in charge" and getting no response at all........Yes, it's you.

    I disagree.

    It's not you, it's them.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BurninLuv View Post
    well that is what i was thinking. im surprised that any vfd would turn away ppl without even seeing what they know but whatever.

    every time i talked to the guy running the mtg, i guess hes in charge, he acts like it. hes the only one who wears a 'dept polo', every bdy else is in whatever.


    i only know abt the monthly mtg which i guess is like a business mtg, i dont know abt any other mtgs. i drive by the station pretty regular ( i get my gas on the other side at the gro and my church is that way also) and i nvr see it open or any one there except for these mnthly meetings.

    i guess it is me but i dont know why thy dont just say 'thanks but no thanks'. rather know up front than be told to come back time aftr time for no reason.

    thers another vfd but its like 6 miles away (this 1 is 1/2 a mile). guess i can check them out.

    thanks for the advice, very helpful guys!
    After seeing this post.....I have to agree with CaptOldTimer
    "This thread is being closed as it is off-topic and not related to the fire industry." - Isn't that what the Off Duty forum was for?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bones42 View Post
    After seeing this post.....I have to agree with CaptOldTimer
    How someone types does not mean it's how they speak and does not reflect the person's ability to act in an emergency situation or on the job. Language is a living creature and growing and changing. I highly doubt he walks around a verbally says "OMG that's so crazy WTF is going on here."

    Last edited by Mr. D.; 08-29-2012 at 11:40 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. D. View Post
    How someone types does not mean it's how they speak and doe snot reflect the person's ability to act in an emergency situation or on the job.
    What a fun typo you have given me today! Maybe Bambi needs a Kleenex.

    But to the topic, a lot of the responses here seem to show an assumption that the department is organized, efficient, and like-minded. That is not always the case. I am highly suspect of any department whose board meets as needed. We have one board meeting per month, even if it's not needed. This keeps our board members involved and feeling needed (none of our voting members comes from the volunteer roster). And in ten years on our board, even with the most anemic agenda, we have found plenty to discuss and plan.

    But that's a sidetrack. Back to membership.

    The "guy in charge" with the polo shirt could be butting heads with the chief, and one wants to do polar opposite of the other. Maybe there's screwy stuff going on with money and they're unsure if they can trust you to be complicit to sloppy bookkeeping, kickbacks, whatever. Maybe they are disorganized and keep saying after you leave, "Did you talk to that new guy (girl)?" "No, I thought you did."

    But we can all speculate until the lime-yellow fire trucks become ripe. Stick your neck out and get something definite. Go to the chief and just ask for your status. If he or somebody else can't get you in motion, screw it. It may not be something you want any part of. Go to the other department, even though it's further away, and you might quickly start learning about the first bunch and why you got nowhere with them.

    Just don't introduce yourself as "I went to XYZFD and they didn't want me." Don't lie, but don't offer it. And then do the usual new person stuff: Shut up and listen, follow the herd, and earn your keep.
    "Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everybody you meet.Ē
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    It's hard to really say without seeing the situation, but as EasyKY said, it may just be a matter of them not being organized. You don't say if you interact with any of the other members, or how the interaction with the "person in charge" goes. Does that person seem interested, did you ask them about attending any other meetings or drills? It's hard to say, but if a person only came to our membership meeting, sat in back, and didn't talk to anybody, we would probably forget about them too.

    There is always the possiblity that this department just isn't a good fit for whatever reason. Checking out the other department might be a good idea.

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    Forum Member Miller337's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BurninLuv View Post
    strange question i suppose but here goes

    i moved here like 2 yrs ago, and wanted to join the local vfd because i was a vfd mem at my previous loc (lived there 5 yrs) and i wanna help. i went to a mtg and they said come to 3 mtgs in a row so we know your serious abt it. Ok fine.

    ive been to 4 mtgs now, none lastd more than 20 mins, and no one spoke to me at all. after each mtg ended i went to the ff in chrge and gave my info so thy could call me and every time i got the 'yeah we'll call u right away u got experience wed luv to have you' but no call.

    i came to the frst mtg in March. its now almost Sept. nothing.

    i dunno what to do. just give up on this? are they tellin me no w/o sayin no to my face? advice plse!
    For the love of BLEEP use ENGLISH. Anyhow, what are your personal hygiene habits? If you are able to speak coherently and don't smell very bad I personally think unless your being a jerk somehow at the meetings you need to find another dept which wants firefighters. This outfit sounds like some little kiddie club b.s. crap.

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    Forum Member BurninLuv's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eng34FF View Post
    It's hard to really say without seeing the situation, but as EasyKY said, it may just be a matter of them not being organized. You don't say if you interact with any of the other members, or how the interaction with the "person in charge" goes. Does that person seem interested, did you ask them about attending any other meetings or drills? It's hard to say, but if a person only came to our membership meeting, sat in back, and didn't talk to anybody, we would probably forget about them too.

    There is always the possiblity that this department just isn't a good fit for whatever reason. Checking out the other department might be a good idea.
    well thats the thing during the mtg i did sit in back and keep my yap shut (thats what noobs r supp to do) but when the mtg ended i came up to the head dude after EVERY MTG and said hey its me, int in joining, i have some exp, yada and they said great, took dwn my info each time and said soneone would call (thy didnt) and to come back to the nxt mtg. done that 3 times now.

    before the lst mtg started i met a dude (mem) we chatted found out he lives like 2 mi from me, we got along fine so i have tried to talk to ppl. i have NOT been a jerk to anybody, i hvent had a chance to LOL... hell i only talked to this one guy other that the HMFIC. i do use speedstick every morn so i dont thk thats it LOL. i know i dont type too good and im sorry abt that bt im a good guy and i want to help but it doesnt look like its in the cards.

    theres a sept mtg comin up but im realy thinking i shld just forget it.

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    Forum Member Bones42's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BurninLuv View Post
    well thats the thing during the mtg i did sit in back and keep my yap shut (thats what noobs r supp to do) but when the mtg ended i came up to the head dude after EVERY MTG and said hey its me, int in joining, i have some exp, yada and they said great, took dwn my info each time and said soneone would call (thy didnt) and to come back to the nxt mtg. done that 3 times now.

    before the lst mtg started i met a dude (mem) we chatted found out he lives like 2 mi from me, we got along fine so i have tried to talk to ppl. i have NOT been a jerk to anybody, i hvent had a chance to LOL... hell i only talked to this one guy other that the HMFIC. i do use speedstick every morn so i dont thk thats it LOL. i know i dont type too good and im sorry abt that bt im a good guy and i want to help but it doesnt look like its in the cards.

    theres a sept mtg comin up but im realy thinking i shld just forget it.
    Can someone translate this into English please?
    "This thread is being closed as it is off-topic and not related to the fire industry." - Isn't that what the Off Duty forum was for?

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    Forum Member Daped01's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bones42 View Post
    Can someone translate this into English please?

    Let me know if I clarified things for you




    "Well thats the thing, during the meeting i did sit in back and keep my yap shut (thats what new guys are supposed to do, right?) But when the meeting ended i came up to the guy running the meeting, just like after EVERY OTHER MEETING and said hey its me, I'm still interested in joining, i have some experience, yada yada yada. They said great, took down my info each time and said soneone would call (which they didnt) and to come back to the next meeting. I have done that 3 times now.

    Before the last meeting started i met a dude (mem(????)) we chatted and I found out he lives like 2 miles from me, we got along fine. So I feel I have tried to talk to people. i have NOT been a jerk to anybody, i havent had a chance to LOL... hell i only talked to this one guy other that the HMFIC. i do use speedstick every morning so i dont think thats it LOL. i know i dont type too good and im sorry about that but im a good guy and i want to help but it doesnt look like its in the cards.

    theres a september meeting coming up but im really thinking i should just forget it."

  19. #19
    Forum Member Bones42's Avatar
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    Thanks, that helps.

    Burninluv....maybe try talking to other people there and getting a name/number of who to follow up with?
    "This thread is being closed as it is off-topic and not related to the fire industry." - Isn't that what the Off Duty forum was for?

  20. #20
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    yea ill try if i decide to go to this next mtg in sept not sure yet im kinda bummed abt the whole thing so well see. if i do ill shake the can some and if i get a response ill let yall know how it goes or if im going to that other dept if they need help

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