Thread: How about some laughs?????
08-21-2000, 01:50 PM #26Speedi120Firehouse.com Guest
Uh Woodman, where do you work? Pigs and goats and a police station? Sounds like Tiawana (spelling ?) or Mayberry.
Woodman, that sounds like a funny story, how about telling us?
08-21-2000, 02:08 PM #27pyroknightFirehouse.com Guest
Tiajuana (it's Spanish, ya know, Mexico). I've watched co-workers attempt to herd cattle on foot. We chased a bat around the fire station for about an hour one night. I picked up a WHOLE bunch of snakes when I worked in AZ, but the worst job I ever had was driving the van with the barrels of snakes (about 50) out into the desert to release them. It's a pretty spooky feeling when you hear a couple dozen rattlers behind you every time you step on the brakes.
08-21-2000, 02:33 PM #28Speedi120Firehouse.com Guest
sticking my tongue out at pyro. However, it is nice to have someone that watches over me and always points out my mistakes. lol
I spelled it that way, then decided that it didn't look right. So I changed it. At least I knew it wasn't spelled right.
are you sure it is Mexico? I was thinking Canada
08-21-2000, 05:30 PM #29Break-N-EntryFirehouse.com Guest
Well, if you really want an animal story:
Our downtown enginehouse is in a very friendly residential area. The neighborhood is really great to us. The house next door is owned by a retired couple that go to Florida for a week or two each year. They used to ask the firefighters to look after all their pets while they went away. (Note: I said "used to ask").
While they were away we would take turns walking the dogs, feeding the cats, their fish, and their prized parakeet. On the day that they are due back we find out that the cat knocked over the bird cage and killed their parakeet.
We got aboard our engine and drove around with the dead bird to 4 or 5 pet shops until we finally found one that matched the dead one. We got back just in time to make the switch before they got home.
We thought we had them fooled, but just as they walked in and started giving us hugs the new parakeet started talking, "Hello, hello, hellooo, helloooooooo" which was something the old dead one never did!
08-21-2000, 05:57 PM #30WOODMANFirehouse.com Guest
North Jersey Speedi,the town next to us at one time had meat packing company that killed
the animals on site and these two animals did not want any part of it and took off running.Our great police dept.caught the two
and being a Sunday the animal control people
take a little longer to show up so they placed the two in the lock up cell in the police station,it worked till someone walked in wondering what all the noise was and the next thing you know out the cell the go out the door of the police station back past the fire house causing some traffic problems. It was a sight to se police, fire,chasing these two poor things,after about 20 minutes we catch them again and we ended up tieing them to the tree next to the fire house .
08-21-2000, 07:18 PM #31jemarFirehouse.com Guest
08-21-2000, 07:27 PM #32Speedi120Firehouse.com Guest
you know, I have not quite figured out how to draw a picture of confusion........
How did this post turn to bathroom and animal stories?
Uh, does someone have something funny that happened in another room?
Come on, surely there are some of you that have some funny calls to talk about.
08-21-2000, 09:10 PM #33Firekatz04Firehouse.com Guest
Okay Speedi, it's time for me to throw one or two in. Sorry but they also take place in the aforementioned bathroom.These weren't my dept., but they were close by, and one even made this website about two months back. It seems a local resident was using a porta pot and got stuck. He, um, fell through. He slid in but got stuck trying to get out. He had to get cut out with a sawzall.
Second call - EMS and rescue were dispatched to the local mall for a person stuck in the restroom. There was some discussion over the radio as to why EMS and rescue were called... why not just unlock the door? It seems this woman went into the restroom to do her "business" and she couldn't get out... oh, did I mention she was EXTREMELY pregnant. LOL!!!
[This message has been edited by Firekatz04 (edited August 21, 2000).]
08-21-2000, 09:38 PM #34Speedi120Firehouse.com Guest
You know I think I read that story. Didn't he lose his keys or something?
08-22-2000, 02:39 PM #35CFD14Firehouse.com Guest
Have you ever seen how far or high someone can jump off a truck when there is a dead bull snake in the drivers seat. It wasn't a fire truck but it still makes me laugh ten years after the fact. If looks could kill, I wouldn't be here today.
08-22-2000, 07:08 PM #361627Firehouse.com Guest
OK Speedi this is a little embarrassing but here we go.
We got toned out for a woods fire when we got on scene the only way to get over to the fire was to go over a pile of ceramic toilets thatís right this person had a pile of toilets in the back yard. Anyway it was fine on the way up but on the way back down my foot went through a couple of them and I had to get some help getting out. First time I can say I ever got stuck in a toilet
SWVFD Station 16
08-22-2000, 09:03 PM #37Speedi120Firehouse.com Guest
Uh, guys, is there something about bathrooms, or bathroom fixtures?
I mean, somehow one of you have found a way to tell me a story about commodes being outside. Now I am not complaining but, I never would have thougt to associate firemen with commodes, inside and out. lol
Is there no one out there with a funny story about something other than a bathroom?
Thanks for the stories though. keep them coming even if they are about bathrooms....
08-25-2000, 03:11 PM #38Speedi120Firehouse.com Guest
Not sure how true this is, but can you imagine being the paramedics on this call.....
The following is taken from The Miami Herald newspaper:
A man was working on his motorcycle on his patio and his wife was in the house in the kitchen. The man was racing the engine on the motorcycle and somehow, the motorcycle slipped into gear. The man, still holding the
handlebars, was dragged through a glass patio door and along with the motorcycle dumped onto the floor inside the house. The wife, hearing the crash, ran into the dining room, and found her husband laying on the floor, cut and bleeding, the motorcycle laying next to him and the patio door
shattered. The wife ran to the phone and summoned an ambulance. Because they
lived on a fairly large hill, the wife went down the several flights of long steps to the street to direct the paramedics to her husband.
After the ambulance arrived and transported the husband to the hospital,the wife uprighted the motorcycle and pushed it outside. Since gas had spilled on the floor, the wife obtained some papers towels, lotted up the gasoline, and threw the towels in the toilet. The husband was treated at the hospital and was released to come home.
After arriving home, he looked at the shattered patio door and the damage done to his motorcycle. He became despondent, went into the bathroom, sat on the toilet and smoked a cigarette. After finishing the cigarette, he flipped it between his legs into the toilet bowl while still seated.
The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard a loud explosion and her husband screaming. She ran into the bathroom and found her husband lying on the floor. His trousers had been blown away and he was suffering burns on the buttocks, the back of his legs and his groin. The wife again ran to the
phone and called for an ambulance. The same ambulance crew was dispatched and the wife met them at the street. The paramedics loaded the husband on the stretcher and began carrying him to the street. While they were going down the stairs to the street accompanied by the wife, one of the paramedics asked the wife how the husband had burned himself.
She told them and the paramedics started laughing so hard, one of them tipped the stretcher over and dumped the husband out. He fell down the remaining steps and broke his arm.
Now THAT is a bad day...
[This message has been edited by Speedi120 (edited August 25, 2000).]
08-26-2000, 01:43 AM #39LOFD_E511Firehouse.com Guest
This one sticks out, told to me by an FEO. A couple years ago before I was a volunteer at my department we responded to a chest pain call, the patient was asked what the pain felt like, he replied with:
"Well, it feels like my wife is sitting on my chest, like an elephant." unfortunatly he didn't see his wife peeking in the door until after he said that, he then relized his mistake and soon said, "Well, maybe not an elephant, but a horse."
The FEO then looked at the patient and said, "Uhh, R*ck, I don't think that helps to much!"...
I thought it was funny... I guess you just have to hear the FEO tell it!!!!
Sutter County Fire - Station 5
Live Oak, CA
08-26-2000, 11:19 AM #40Speedi120Firehouse.com Guest
Wacky 911 calls
A call came into 911 Emergency because two couples were going to share a hotel room and there weren't enough towels.
A man called 911 and said: "Please connect me to Seitzerland."
A lady called 911 because of a fight going on in a parking lot. When asked to describe the combatants, she said: "I'll try. There's one man, and he's dressed like Elvis. He's kicking another man who's laying on the ground and screaming 'You ain't nothing but a hound dog.'"
Another person called to report he had the hiccups.
A thirteen-year-old boy called to report he had "stuff" coming from his navel. Paramedics examined the boy and all they found was belly-button lint.
A male complainant called and requested police call gas stations on all exits of I-95 to find out which ones were open.
A woman called emergency to report she had seen a wild mouse in her house.
Someone called 911 to report the parrot got out of his cage and is in a tree outside.
A man broke up with his girlfriend and wanted police to go by her house and report to him the owners of any cars, other than hers, in her driveway.
A man called to report he had a roach stuck in his ear.
A guy called to ask if they delivered dope. When the person answering told him it was the Sheriff's Department, he hung up.
Another winner called to ask when the Cinco de Mayo celebration was. (Cinco de Mayo means the 5th of May)
A female complainant called to request a police officer come to her residence to change the battery in her smoke detector. She couldn't reach it.
A drunk called 911 to order a pizza.
A woman called to report that someone had trespassed on her property. When asked how she knew this, she reported that the person had trimmed her rose bushes, and she knew it was her next-door neighbor.
A person called to find out the number to the police station.
08-26-2000, 02:03 PM #41Truckie from MissouriFirehouse.com Guest
This happened just last nite...
Our station is getting renovated, and there is one of those huge dumpsters in the back lot. I was showing another firefighter how to use the new thermal image camera (TIC). He was walking around, checking things out, and noticed a hot spot on the dumpster. He showed me, and it sure looked like one. We felt the metal, and it was very warm to the touch. Curious to see if we were about to have a dumpster fire, we got a pike pole and started digging... I turns out that during the 100+ degree day, the ceramic toilet in the bottom of the dumpster had retained the heat longer than the steel walls, and was now radiating heat off...
This one happened several years ago, when I was a station resident at a small town vfd...
The dispatcher calls me and tells me there is a parrot stuck in a tree at the city park. So, wait until it flies down! Then she informs me that this parrot cannot fly, that a gust of wind carried it up to the tree. Ok, I'll bite. I took the particulars, finished lunch and then got in the pumper.
Given the nature of the call, I figured it might be best to just do it, not make any fanfare about it, and get back to the house fast! Our station was a few blocks from the sherrif's office, who did our dispatching. The dispatcher who called me was outside on a "fresh air" break. I saw her as I drove by; she saw me and quickly put out her cancer stick and scambled back inside, and I just sank in as low as I could get.
3-11, are you en route to the rescue?
Very weakly I replied Yes.
10-4, stand by for tones.
DIspatcher, I don't think that'll be necces~ Too late. Now scannerland knows, as well as every other fire department in the county. She broadcasted every detail of the call... Man, oh man, am I gonna get some ***** for this!
So anyway, I arrived and met the indiviual where I was told he'd be. He explained that this bird's wings are clipped, so he doesn't fly. When I questioned him how this bird that doesn't fly got 18 feet up that tree over there, Oh, a huge gust of wind came along. Huge gust of wind my left big toe! I then explained to him that we were in a of a high pressure center, and that there was no wind to be had, except for that of passing vehicles, and perhaps when we break wind. So I then again asked how the bird got up there... he then admitted it's been a while since the wings were trimmed...
Ok, now that we got that clear, I explained my plan. We would try one (1) time only with the extension ladder. "Plan B" is that water cannon on top of the truck.
We set up the ladder, I held it while he climbed it, and just as he got to the bird, you guessed it! It flew to another tree. So, away goes the ladder, on came the pump, and then I started squirting water. I aimed it at the truck of the tree, at the base, and slowly worked my way up, then the bird got the point and flew back to it's cage. Only used a 1/2 tank, too!
08-26-2000, 02:11 PM #42Speedi120Firehouse.com Guest
Ok Well that does it. I love my pooch to much to have her shot out of a tree by water guess she won't be thrown up any trees any time soon.
Thanks Truckie, me and my son got a good laugh out of your story.
08-26-2000, 04:55 PM #43PGFD236Firehouse.com Guest
We had just completed training one night when we decided to head back to the station.
I jumped into the drivers side of our depts
suburban and FF Wade Brent jumped into the passengers side. We also had 2 Explorer members with us riding in rear seats. I started to drive off when i realized neither Wade nor myself had our seatbelts on. I stopped the truck and told him to buckle up. He got his belt on before I did and I told him that in this model of truck we had to click the belts on at the same time in order for mine to lock. I told him to lock it on 3,
I counted out loud 1,2,3 click. I looked at him and said great job, he was so proud. I looked into the back seat to find our Jr.s with tears in their eyes from laughing but not out loud so Wade never caught on. Returning to the station I asked Wade if any of the probies knew about the seat belt system and if not show them. He grabbed 3 guys and started giving a class on the proper way to engage the belts. The new guys
looked at him like he had lost his mind.
After 5 minutes I went out to the truck looked at Wade and said gotcha. I thought he was going to have a heart attack chasing me.
Wades a good guy but damn gullible. Stay Safe
08-26-2000, 11:43 PM #44Truckie from MissouriFirehouse.com Guest
At a wreck many moons ago, a deputy and I got the grim task of looking for a patients amputated arm. We found it a short time after we started. This arm is where the victom wore his watch. We looked at it, then eachother, and simultaneously said, Takes a lickin' & keeps on tickin'!
I once went to a reported house fire. A teen was smoking in the bathroom, and heard his parents come home earlier than expected. He ditched his cancer stick in the trash can after he thought it was out. The trash can was immediately adjacent to the toilet. The heat from the resulting fire melted the PVC on the supply pipe, and that pressurized water started putting out the fire. We took the report and left. The parents later came by the station to tell us the damage would be fixed, and that Junior would be doing extra chores for quite some time to pay it off...
08-26-2000, 11:54 PM #45Speedi120Firehouse.com Guest
Your little guy that is sick, is uh, SICK.
How did you do that?
08-27-2000, 08:40 AM #46NCFiremedicFirehouse.com Guest
Please don't keep us in waiting!!!! How'd you do that?
08-27-2000, 01:09 PM #47Truckie from MissouriFirehouse.com Guest
I am a Jedi Knight! The Force is strong with me!
Don't believe that? Good, you shouldn't. I just like keeping the rookies jumping!
Instead of quickly surfing, just take a around the internet and you'll find some resources!
08-27-2000, 01:12 PM #48Speedi120Firehouse.com Guest
That is not fair. As helpful as I have been in my post and you won't help me out here. Hmmm a fireman that won't help a lady. Man this is a sad state of affairs.
08-27-2000, 01:48 PM #49medic3401Firehouse.com Guest
We are from the dark side!!!
We have put our two half brains together to make a full brain and have figured it out.
Just go to his post and edit it and you can see what he typed to get those ultra cool smilies!!!!
Hope this helps.
NCFiremedic and medic3401
The dark side will always conquer!
If a fire is an emergency to the fire dept., who do they call?
[This message has been edited by medic3401 (edited August 27, 2000).]
[This message has been edited by medic3401 (edited August 27, 2000).]
08-27-2000, 01:54 PM #50medic3401Firehouse.com Guest
Just trying something out.
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