1. #51
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    and it said, "Go back inside, drink more beer. There will be a structure fire in 42 minutes. Go on, drink up. Ok, what do I have to do make you understand about drinking. It's alright to drink. You were made with a liver for a reason." I comtemplated my next step carefully...
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  2. #52
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    ...My first step was to turn around.... and a second and a third... back into the bar I went....

    That damn Monkey up on the bar counter, drinking from my beer again. (HAAA, the joke is on him this time... Before I left the bar, I had dipped my......)
    If you don't do it RIGHT today, when will you have time to do it over? (Hall of Fame basketball player/coach John Wooden)

    "I may be slow, but my work is poor." Chief Dave Balding, MVFD

    "Its not Rocket Science. Just use a LITTLE imagination." (Me)

    Get it up. Get it on. Get it done!

    impossible solved cotidie. miracles postulo viginti - quattuor hora animadverto

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  3. #53
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    ...banana in the deep luscious head.

  4. #54
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    ...and given it a good swirling around...boy wasn't the Monkey gonna have an ugly taste in his mouth.

    As I ordered up a fresh pint of God's Nectar, I contemplated both my perplexing golf problem, and the delema of my neighbour.

    For the golf thing I was thinking....
    If you don't do it RIGHT today, when will you have time to do it over? (Hall of Fame basketball player/coach John Wooden)

    "I may be slow, but my work is poor." Chief Dave Balding, MVFD

    "Its not Rocket Science. Just use a LITTLE imagination." (Me)

    Get it up. Get it on. Get it done!

    impossible solved cotidie. miracles postulo viginti - quattuor hora animadverto

    IACOJ member: Cheers, Play safe y'all.

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    A minute passed. Then another. Then, another minute. Then... another minute passed. Then another minute passed. And another. A further minute passed quickly, followed by another minute, when suddenly, a different minute passed, followed by another different minute. And another. And yet another further different minute. A minute passed.

    I glanced at my watch. It was a minute past. This was it. A minute passed. After a moment, another minute passed. I waited a minute while a minute passed quickly past. And then, a minute which seemed to last an hour but was only a minute... passed.

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    And then something really stranged happened.... a really different minute passed...

    But I digress... (in a totally new minute) a thought came to me. I was looking at the Monkey, watching him dip his thing in the beer, when it came to me, the answer to all questions:
    If you don't do it RIGHT today, when will you have time to do it over? (Hall of Fame basketball player/coach John Wooden)

    "I may be slow, but my work is poor." Chief Dave Balding, MVFD

    "Its not Rocket Science. Just use a LITTLE imagination." (Me)

    Get it up. Get it on. Get it done!

    impossible solved cotidie. miracles postulo viginti - quattuor hora animadverto

    IACOJ member: Cheers, Play safe y'all.

  7. #57
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    Then the monkey broke out in song.....
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    Time passes quickly when you're having fun. Suddenly, there was a gasp in the bar. The room went silent. Standing at the door was the greatest golfer of all time....TIGER WOODS!

    He came in and sat down between me and the monkey. What brings you here...I asked the golf great? He laughed, looked at the monkey and said...
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    ...did you see that burning tumbleweed out there.

  10. #60
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    "Is that a Monkey on the bar, or are you just glad to see me? No seriously...."
    If you don't do it RIGHT today, when will you have time to do it over? (Hall of Fame basketball player/coach John Wooden)

    "I may be slow, but my work is poor." Chief Dave Balding, MVFD

    "Its not Rocket Science. Just use a LITTLE imagination." (Me)

    Get it up. Get it on. Get it done!

    impossible solved cotidie. miracles postulo viginti - quattuor hora animadverto

    IACOJ member: Cheers, Play safe y'all.

  11. #61
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    Tiger gave the monkey the "once over."

    "Your date needs a shave fella...." he said, grinning. "But I'm actually here to meet Anna Kournikova....she'd like to smack a few balls with me." I turned to the bartender and asked....
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  12. #62
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    "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll lolly pop?"
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  13. #63
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    The bartender didn't hear me. He gazed out into space...smiled and said..."If Anna's gonna come in here and smack balls, I'm gonna get in line now. Does she prefer fuzzy ones...or dimpled?" Even the monkey got in line. As for me...I
    Proudly serving as the IACOJ Minister of Information & Propoganda!
    Be Safe! Lookouts-Awareness-Communications-Escape Routes-Safety Zones

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  14. #64
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    ...went outside to see if Tiger really drives a Buick when suddenly...
    "We shouldn't be opening firehouses in Baghdad and closing them in New York City."

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    The biggest gosh darn firetruck with Class A and B foam, Purple K, Cab mounted Thermal Imagers came screaming over the hill. I yelled to the one guy on the piece, "Hey aren't you.......

  16. #66
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    ...Capt Gonzo, and what in the world are you doing driving that thing naked! To which he replied, "...
    My posts reflect my views and opinions, not the organization I work for or my IAFF local. Some of which they may not agree. I.A.C.O.J. member
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    ...I'm not Gonzo. He's in the bathtub and I just saw Anna Kornikova go in there
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    in to which the entire membership of the IACOJ rushes in! Soon there is a shudder, than a roar, E229lt yells, "Run for the door!". It's to late, and the floor comes tumbling down...
    My posts reflect my views and opinions, not the organization I work for or my IAFF local. Some of which they may not agree. I.A.C.O.J. member
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    ...Gonzo grabs for his shirt. It's obvious to all he has never let the sun hit his body. Anna is a wet, soapy mess. The "Women of the Tundra" escort her out...Damn!
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    out to a lengere(sp?) store where they take turns...
    Last edited by snowball; 12-06-2002 at 07:24 PM.
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    ...trying to spell lingerie. It's futile. They leave Anna and return to the trapped members of the IACOJ. A finer looking RIT team was never assembled.

    First, Tempie reached down and grabbed...

  22. #72
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    .....cheffie's garter and.....
    Last edited by StayBack500FT; 12-06-2002 at 07:53 PM.
    May we never forget our fallen, worldwide.

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  23. #73
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    the monkey by his...
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  24. #74
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    ...organ grinder. A cheer went up from the crowd. Then Respect found Gonzo's......

  25. #75
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    ...Big Johnson_____________________T shirt, oh my goodness Respected cried, could our man Gonzo still be...
    My posts reflect my views and opinions, not the organization I work for or my IAFF local. Some of which they may not agree. I.A.C.O.J. member
    "I ask, Sir, what is the militia? It is the whole people. To disarm the people is the best and most effectual way to enslave them."
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    during Virginia's Convention to Ratify the Constitution, 1788
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