1. #1
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    Talking Spelling Bloopers From The Dispatchers...........

    Can't help wondering if all dispatchers need spellcheck software in their computers? Here's why, Most departments nowdays have a sophisticated computer system that, among other things, sends a text message to a printer and/or pagers. Quite often, a misspelled word will appear. A Few Samples:

    1. Ambulance 6, your patient is a 36 year old female, bleeding heavily from the Virginia.
    2. History of trouble breeding
    3. Engine 183, responding for wires down and barking

    And the list goes on................. But, you get the idea. Anyone else got any??
    Never use Force! Get a Bigger Hammer.
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    Asst. Chief John R. Woods Sr. 1937 - 2006

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    Ours can't interpert what the CAD type codes really mean. We get dispatched for "ANASHOCK"(anaphylactic shock)and "BREATH" (difficulty breathing) all the time.

    I guess it comes with the territory when you have Sheriff dispatchers with very little fire or EMS training.
    FTM-PTB-DTRT

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    Luckily where I dispatch we enter the calls into the CAD system after the call is over, because we are still in the stoneage plus none of the fire or EMS have CAD computers at the stations or in the rigs...YET...it would be nice though
    Andrew
    Firefighter/EMT
    New Jersey

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    Harve, I've got trouble breeding. What good is an ambulance trip going to do?

    I note that all of the bloopers you posted were spelled correctly.

    Don't know where I got this; it's too clever for me to have written:
    -------
    “Ode to the Spell Checker!”

    Eye halve a spelling chequer
    It came with my pea sea
    It plainly marques four my revue
    Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.

    Eye strike a key and type a word
    And weight four it two say
    Weather eye am wrong oar write
    It shows me strait a weigh.

    As soon as a mist ache is maid
    It nose bee fore two long
    And eye can put the error rite
    Its rare lea ever wrong.

    Eye have run this poem threw it
    I am shore your pleased two no
    Its letter perfect awl the weigh
    My chequer tolled me sew.
    ------------------

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    We're 100% voice dispatched, but we did have a motorcycle MVC where the dispatcher advised us "the patient's leg is decapitated at the knee".
    "Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everybody you meet.”
    --General James Mattis, USMC


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    I had a "trouble bleeding" one time...turns out it was trouble breathing...but with the dispatcher he had that day, and his past of mis-dispatches, we kinda thought it was the difficulty breathing anyway....
    The comments made by me are my opinions only, not of the Fire and EMS services I am affiliated with.

    I have lost my mind..has anyone seen it? it's not worth much..but it's mine

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    Harve, were you driving 20's wagon the other day at the Marlton Shopping Center Box? If so, how does the back of 255 look!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA! If you weren't driving, I feel sorry for the guy who was, because 20A was quite disappointed that his boys got spanked in by the Slowest Wagon in the County....


    I am a dispatcher, I don't make mistakes...

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    Hey Tiller, you are a male ....... ergo you make mistakes !!!
    To the world you might be one person, but to one person you just might be the world.

    IACOJ-WOT proud

    GO WHITE SOX!!!!!

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    Oh my GOD! A sexist remark?...LOL

    I am a supervisor, so when in doubt, Blame the newest Dispatcher and claim lack of training on Administration's part....

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    well well well..............you wanna rip on dispatchers huh? I have never missed dispatch a run but there have been a couple of streets that have boogered me up and also I have had numerous open mic boo-boos.............the streets are (in no particular order)
    Regina Choeli (pronounced Chay-lee)
    Shinnecock Ave
    Koch (Koch or Cook?)
    by far the open mic blunders are the funniest ...........I am sure '77 can fill you in once he sees this ......

    I have had to call our FD center a couple of times for such fascinating call natures as a "person gagging" and a person in "blood sugar shock". That caused me to write a memo to only dispatch us on calls using the 34 "typecodes" found on the NAEMD cards.
    IACOJ both divisions and PROUD OF IT !
    Pardon me sir.. .....but I believe we are all over here !
    ATTENTION ALL SHOPPERS: Will the dead horse please report to the forums.(thanks Motown)
    RAY WAS HERE 08/28/05
    LETHA' FOREVA' ! 010607
    I'm sorry, I haven't been paying much attention for the last 3 hours.....what were we discussing?
    "but I guarentee you I will FF your arse off" from>
    http://www.firehouse.com/forums/show...60#post1137060post 115

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    Well, well, well.......... Funny this topic came up, as we had one this morning........

    Our FD was dispatched to 015 Wanker Point today......... It's actually 8015 Rinker Pt.

    As for the Roads...... Weruj had a small spelling error..... It's Regina Coeli..........

    How about ........

    Nevada (pronounced Nevayda)
    Blum (Bloom)
    Hoag (Hoyg)
    Buzcko (Booshko)
    Kosciusko (Kochoosko)

    Or one of our co-workers sent crews to
    "Wyandot" when the street is Yondota
    "Mongolia" when the street was Magnolia
    Dispatched crews to an MVA at Monroe and Huron when it was actually about 10 miles west of there at Monroe and Harroun........

    Weruj thought he was playing on the intercom, talking to one of the fire dispatchers acting like he was the officer on a "Three Alarm Trash Can Fire" when he was actually talking on the Fire Departments EMS Channel........

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    Originally posted by WTFD10
    I guess it comes with the territory when you have Sheriff dispatchers with very little fire or EMS training.
    I told you how we can get that taken care of for you, Moe..........

  13. #13
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    Originally posted by TillerMan25
    Harve, were you driving 20's wagon the other day at the Marlton Shopping Center Box? If so, how does the back of 255 look!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
    I am a dispatcher, I don't make mistakes...
    No Dummy, I was on my way home from work. I drive the dark green Dodge that was on the beach across from the hydrant. I was NB on 301 at Ransom Motors when the box was put out, and I stopped at Rosaryville rd. to let you guys out. Dodge gets right along! Stay Safe....

    Almost Forgot. Have you seen the Tractor drawn Ladder Truck at Brandywine Truck Parts??
    Last edited by hwoods; 05-21-2004 at 11:50 PM.
    Never use Force! Get a Bigger Hammer.
    In memory of
    Chief Earle W. Woods, 1912 - 1997
    Asst. Chief John R. Woods Sr. 1937 - 2006

    IACOJ Budget Analyst

    I Refuse to be a Spectator. If I come to the Game, I'm Playing.

    www.gdvfd18.com

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    We are voice dispatched.

    The other night our dispatcher put out a severe thunderstorm warning. She was supposed to say "The National Weather Service has issued a severe thunderstorm warning For Rapid City and Rapid Valley effective until 6:30 PM". What she said was "The National Weather Service has issued a severe thunderstorm to Rapid City and Rapid Valley effective until 6:30 PM".

    I didn't know the weather service could issue severe storms.

    Memo to self; Do not upset the weather service people, they can now get even.

    Stay Safe
    IACOJ

  15. #15
    55 Years & Still Rolling
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    Talking This Just In.....................

    From P.G.County Communications: ....."an overturned vehicle that appears to be seriously injuried"
    Never use Force! Get a Bigger Hammer.
    In memory of
    Chief Earle W. Woods, 1912 - 1997
    Asst. Chief John R. Woods Sr. 1937 - 2006

    IACOJ Budget Analyst

    I Refuse to be a Spectator. If I come to the Game, I'm Playing.

    www.gdvfd18.com

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    Default Pirsch TDA

    Yeah, I have seen it. It's an Old Alexandria Virginia Reserve. I am sure Danny B. would let someone put that right in service...LOL>

    We can always wish! It is still too new to privately own and run through parades or put historic tags on it.

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    Ok, it wasn't a spelling error, but a funny dispatch when I was a dispatcher. I was answering the phone one night shift and answered the phone to the following call:

    The call came in for a cat that had been in a chimney. The homeowner lit a fire in the fireplace and the cat caught on fire, came out of the chimney and ran into the bathroom. The homeowner had the cat in the bathroom. The call went out as "A smoking pussy cornered in the bathroom".

    LMAO!! Every once in a while all that night, someone would key up and meow.. It was classic and is still in the tape archives.

    Anyway
    Proud to be an official member of the I.A.C.O.J.

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    now thats funny......and almost sounds like something '77 would say !
    IACOJ both divisions and PROUD OF IT !
    Pardon me sir.. .....but I believe we are all over here !
    ATTENTION ALL SHOPPERS: Will the dead horse please report to the forums.(thanks Motown)
    RAY WAS HERE 08/28/05
    LETHA' FOREVA' ! 010607
    I'm sorry, I haven't been paying much attention for the last 3 hours.....what were we discussing?
    "but I guarentee you I will FF your arse off" from>
    http://www.firehouse.com/forums/show...60#post1137060post 115

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    Originally posted by firenresq77
    Weruj thought he was playing on the intercom, talking to one of the fire dispatchers acting like he was the officer on a "Three Alarm Trash Can Fire" when he was actually talking on the Fire Departments EMS Channel........
    ROFLMAO! I'm sorry I didn't hear that one!
    FTM-PTB-DTRT

  20. #20
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    Originally posted by Weruj1
    now thats funny......and almost sounds like something '77 would say !
    Not as far as you know!!!!!!!!


    And yes, Moe, it was HILARIOUS!!! Almost as good as some of the calls I have taken. Like the girl who thought she needed to go to jail for domestic violence because she hit her boyfriend over the head with the phone in their hotel room because he called her a Wh0re and a Sl*t and said her Pus*y was nasty!!!

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    A few weeks ago a neighbouring department was called to a "smoking mail box".... shortly after being dispatched we hear "Shawnigan Ladder 10 enroute to smoking mail box"

    A few days later we ran an an MVA and the DC from Shawnigan was riding on the ambulance that showed up. After they checked out the PT (who refused treatment), we calmly asked the DC if he needed Ladder 10 for ventilation?? he just shook his head and laughed.
    "No one ever called the Fire Department for doing something smart..."

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    LMAO!! Three alarm trash can fire... LOL!

    One night all we in dispatch heard was (screaming) GET YOUR HANDS UP! ZIP UP YOUR PANTS AND GET ON THE GROUND!! DON'T MOVE OR I WILL SHOOT!Of course those of us in dispatch scrambled to find out who it was and if they needed help

    Apparently we had some officers late that night who were screwing around in their brand-spanking-new-don't-even-have-the-attenna-on-the-building-yet-so-dispatch-won't-hear-us police department. But we did. One was using the bathroom and the other was trying to "bust" him by using his radio.

    It's always fun until someone gets caught!!
    Proud to be an official member of the I.A.C.O.J.

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    Well my story of a open mike:

    We were practicing LDH hoselays and relay pumping at one of the local shopping center parking lots. We were on our "fireground" channel with the radio in scan mode so we could still pick up the primary dispatch. Our newest Captain was assisting a rookie on the truck and how to flow the deck gun and I am on the hydrant. All of the sudden I am getting soaked with a deck gun. I look up an their is the Captain laughing as he swung the deck gun back the other way. I then get on my portable and remind him that is horse-play, as I release the key I hear the repeater "kick" off. Our fireground doesn't have a repeater
    AKA: Mr. Whoo-Whoo

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    Oh yes.... leaving the radio keyed up.... gotta love those bloopers.

    I remember when I first joined the department. I had a good ol' Minitor I (I think I still walk with a limp from having all that weight on my hip ), anyway, I was in town and we got a call and I was listening to the trucks sign on. A few minutes later I head "*$@ *!$& peice of $hit, someone left the &*%king door open. ^&*) ^&&**( %^&$!!!"

    Our rescue is a walk in style with a large roll-up cargo door at the back. I guess someone left it open, along with one of the cabinets, so when they pulled out and started down the street the contents of the cabinet fell out onto the floor and when they looked back to see what was happening they seen the rear door was open. The mic in the rescue was broken and stayed keyed up the entire time.

    Lukily we didn't have the radio set up we have now, or half the island would have heard it.

    -----------------------------------------

    Anyone else keep a box of medical gloves on the dash of their rigs??? Ever wondered what would happen if the window was open and you went around a corner?? needless to say, it is embaressing to radio one of the following units to stop and pick them up
    "No one ever called the Fire Department for doing something smart..."

  25. #25
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    Originally posted by firefighter26
    Anyone else keep a box of medical gloves on the dash of their rigs??? Ever wondered what would happen if the window was open and you went around a corner?? needless to say, it is embaressing to radio one of the following units to stop and pick them up
    Ja?? Honey?? Wasn't that you and wasn't that when I was there????
    Proud to be an official member of the I.A.C.O.J.

    Paremediks R Us - You cut em - We gut em!

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