Rank Definitions

[nozzelvfd]

RANK DEFINITIONS FOR A

FIRE DEPARTMENT

Chief: Leaps short buildings with a single bound. Is more powerful than a ladder truck. Is faster than a speeding bullet. Walks on water. Gives policy to God.

Assistant Chief: Leaps short buildings with a single bound. Is more powerful than a pumper. Is just as fast as a speeding bullet. Walks on water if sea is calm. talks with god.

Deputy Chief: Leaps short buildings with a running start and favorable winds. Is almost as powerful as a pumper. Is faster than a speeding BB. Walks on water in indoor swimming pools. Talks with God if special request is approved.

Engineer: Makes high marks on buildings when trying to leap them. Is run over by a pumper. Can sometimes handle a gun without inflicting self-injury. dog paddles in swimming pools. Talks with animals.

Captain: Runs into buildings when trying to leap them. Recognizes pumpers two out of three times. Is not allowed to use guns. Can stay afloat if properly instructed in the use of a life jacket. Talks to walls.

Lieutenant: Falls over doorsteps when trying to enter buildings. Points and says, "look at the pretty fire engine". Wets himself with a water pistol. Plays in mud puddles. mumbles to himself.

Firefighter: Lifts buildings and walks under them. Kicks fire engines and equipment out of his way. Catches speeding bullets in his teeth and eats them. freezes water with a single glance. He is God.

[captstanm1]

SEARCH SEARCH......this has floated around before!

[RyanEMVFD]

Originally posted by nozzelvfd
Firefighter: Lifts buildings and walks under them. Kicks fire engines and equipment out of his way. Catches speeding bullets in his teeth and eats them. freezes water with a single glance. He is God.

Are you sure this isn't a probie?

[Dave1983]

Probie:

Cant find the building
Wonders why that pumper has a ladder on top
Plays with cap guns
Likes to blow bubbles
Speaks only when spoken too