1. #1
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    Default Highschool School bans hugging. whats next?

    Hugging Ban Sparks Dispute at Ore. School

    Mon May 16, 1:22 PM ET

    BEND, Ore. - A 14-year-old girl received detention over a lingering hug she gave her boyfriend at school, infuriating her mother and putting school officials on the defensive.

    School officials said they had warned Cazz Altomare that lingering hugging was unacceptable, but she continued to disobey the rule when she received the detention earlier this year.

    Rules at Sky View Middle School in Bend permit "quick hello and goodbye hugs," but administrators said some students have been taking advantage of it.

    "It's not like we are the hug Nazis," Laurie Gould, spokeswoman for the Bend-La Pine School District, said Monday. "Kids hug, they hug hello and they hug goodbye, but if you take it farther, you make people uncomfortable."

    Cazz got detention after giving her boyfriend a protracted hug in the hallway at Sky View Middle School in Bend.

    Her mother, Leslee Swanson, was infuriated by the punishment. When she went to pick her daughter up from detention, she gave her a good, hard hug.

    "I'm trying to understand what's wrong with a hug," Swanson, 42, said in a story Sunday in The Bulletin of Bend. People should not "blindly accept these fundamental rights being taken away from them," she said.

    Gould said "usually kids don't get detention just for hugging."

    All middle schools in the Bend-La Pine district restrict hugging to some degree, as well as hand-holding and some other forms of physical affection.

    "Really, all we're trying to do is create an environment that's focused on learning, and learning proper manners is part of that," said Dave Haack, the principal of Cascade Middle School, also in Bend.

    Students only end up with detention after repeated warnings earlier this year, he said.

    Outside Pilot Butte Middle School on a recent lunch break, two seventh-grade girls said they disagreed with the policies.

    "I think we should be able to hold hands or hug at least," said Annie Wilson, 12. "Because it's not doing anything bad."

    http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/hugging_ban
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    PDA was severly curtailed until High School in my school district. I want to know if this was a gropeing hug, if she was told to move along in the hall way and refused, or what the true circumstances were.
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    Holding hands and hugging IMO is accceptable but it depends on the circumstances and the situation. I remember in my school couples hugging and kissing in the hall ways started major 'traffic jams' and it was very hard to get to class...

    They said they permit "hello and goodbye" hugs. Sounds fine to me.

    But if they focus so much on hugging, what is happening behide the scenes? A detention for hugging, well, what punishment would the students receive for fighting?
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    Schools make rules. You follow them or are punished. Sounds very simple to me.
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    Now Noz, that was funny.

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    Who are these people to dictate what is and isn't a "lingering hug." IT should be expressly written out what constitutes what, and by all appearances, it isn't.

    Freaking schools are worried about making people uncomforatble. Oooh, someone who does not have a boyfriend might be uncomfortable because the girl who has one got a hug.

    Now if the girl continued to do so after being told, that I have a problem with, but you better spell out what is and is not acceptable to let everyone be on the same sheet of music here.

    Pretty freaking rediculous if you ask me. About as dumb as sending kids home from school because they wore a T-shirt with a picture of a firearm on it. Next thing you know, you won't be able to say "I love you" to someone.

    Might be satan taking over and we will have to call in Church Lady.
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    Why did they only warn the girl??? Sounds like the school is a discrminating pos.

    They are soo worried about people hugging, when people are cheating on tests, stealing things, and beating up other kids. THE TEACHERS OF THIS COUNTRY AND THE ADMINISTRATORS NEED TO LEARN HOW TO DO THEIR ******* JOB.
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    Originally posted by CaptainMikey
    THE TEACHERS OF THIS COUNTRY AND THE ADMINISTRATORS NEED TO LEARN HOW TO DO THEIR ******* JOB.


    Please...please just let me do my job...let me teach. The last thing in the world I wish to be is the Hug Police. Generally speaking, these things start because somebody filed a complaint regarding the said act...and BY GOD, THEY WANT ACTION OR HEADS WILL ROLL AROUND THIS PLACE!!! So, they got action.


    Mikey, do my job for a day...perhaps your perspective would change.
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    Originally posted by Conster74
    ) getting their stupid asses into the classroom
    Conster

    Thanks.
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    Default Re: Highschool School bans hugging. whats next?

    Originally posted by DrParasite



    School officials said they had warned Cazz Altomare that lingering hugging was unacceptable, but she continued to disobey the rule when she received the detention earlier this year.

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    Originally posted by CaptainMikey
    They are soo worried about people hugging, when people are cheating on tests, stealing things, and beating up other kids. THE TEACHERS OF THIS COUNTRY AND THE ADMINISTRATORS NEED TO LEARN HOW TO DO THEIR ******* JOB.
    How about the parents doing their jobs teaching their kids that cheating on tests, stealing things, and beating up other kids is unacceptable. Stop blaming the educators because other people's kids are unbridled and undisciplined. That "education" should be done at home. Teaching kids basic core values and human decency is the parent's job; not the school's Besides, everytime they try, psycho-mom's come into the schools wanting someone's head on a a stick for "disrespecting" their child.

    You couldn't pay me enough to be a teacher. Discipline in the classroom is something you just can't enforce without someone getting ****ed.

    Parents should be doing the discipline; teachers shouldn't have to. Let them do what they do best...teach.
    Last edited by Steamer; 05-17-2005 at 10:35 PM.
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    Stayback, I was a teachers aide all 4 years of my highschool. So I know alittle about what it takes.

    The comment that I made was to the teachers of that school. Not to all of them in general.

    In my mind teachers are some of the best people on the face of the earth and are not paid enough for what they do.
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    Parents should be doing the discipline; teachers shouldn't have to.
    Teachers shouldnt have to but they do and if they dont then they wont have control in their classroom and the kids take advantage...so yes i do think teachers also should be doing their jobs telling kids how to act and disciplining them.


    They are soo worried about people hugging, when people are cheating on tests, stealing things, and beating up other kids.
    In my school it seems that the faculty and the administrators are more concernced about kids being late than they ongoing drug problem, maybe everyone just wont believe it because its oh the rich hunterdon county where no kids do anything wrong. i have gotten numerous detentions for being late which yes i know its breaking the rules but still i wish they would concentrate on the drugs that pass through this school. i remember sophomore year this girl asked i wanted to buy some coke and she pulled out the huge bag of it. i mean ive seen so many drugs go through here that the DEA would have a field day.



    everytime they try, psycho-mom's come into the schools wanting someone's head on a a stick for "disrespecting" their child.

    well what gives a teacher the right to make fun of a student or curse at them? nothing therefore they should be held accountable for what happens if a mother wants to go all psycho on them well then im sure they deserved it.
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    Also, My first few years of elementary school were hell on earth. I was harrased each day of the friggin year. While the teachers and administration sat and worried about little piddly things. So when I hear about a school that is diciplining on something so ridiculous as this it kind of pushes a few buttons.
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    *to complete my last sentence of my previous post*

    It pushes a few buttons when I hear of schools so concentrated on diciplining a issue so ridiculous as the one stated, when there is so many other issues that need to be and can be addressed.
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    Originally posted by CaptainMikey
    Also, My first few years of elementary school were hell on earth. I was harrased each day of the friggin year. While the teachers and administration sat and worried about little piddly things. So when I hear about a school that is diciplining on something so ridiculous as this it kind of pushes a few buttons.

    From the bottom of my heart, I am truly sorry this was your experience. Just as there are poor firefighters, there are poor teachers...but please don't lump us in the same boat.




    101truck - I have NEVER cursed at or "made fun of" a student...yet I have fielded complaints for managing my classroom in the past.
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    Stayback, Im not lumping anyone into a boat. I was just stating that when there is any news that relates to bogus or ridiculous diciplining I am kind of alittle biased on my opinions of it.


    I actualy think it is cool that you are able to handle 2 of the most hardest jobs know to man.

    By the way what grades do you teach?
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    Originally posted by Conster74
    That's very interesting that you say that parents should be the ones doing the disciplining when its the teachers who are the first ones who turn us in the first time little Johnny tells them we whupped him for breaking the neighbors' car windows because he and his friends were throwing rocks. Can't tell a kid how to behave in a non-hedonistic fashion without Child Protective and/or the police showing up at your door.


    Teachers are mandated to report abuse...ABUSE. I have no problem with parents paddling youngsters. When Johnny comes in with a shiner and says that Dad cracked him in the face for throwing rocks...do you wish for me to ignore it?
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    Mikey, I teach fifth grade and I actually do love my job. What's amazing is many of the items people complain about regarding public schools...are the very same issues the teachers are complaining about.
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    Again, as I told Mikey, I am truly saddened when I hear stories like yours. I am also aware that not all teachers are cut from the same cloth. I guess I take just as much offense to teachers "in general" being lumped into a group of "stupid asses" as I would if some lumped Brothers and Sisters into the same grouping. We are all not the same...please keep that in mind.
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    When i joined my high school i had to sign a 'hands off' policy. Means that your not allowed to touch other kids except in certain activities such as sport, etc... Basically you COULD touch other kids except for fighting and couples in relationships. The policy was just there so that it could be enforced if needed in a case like this, though in reality it was hardly ever enforced. I think it worked perfectly. If a student wanted to debate it or a parent did, then that long forgotten piece of paper was pulled out of the filling cabinet and shoved under their noses.
    It rarely got to this stage though, but as a prefect i used to warn students just for the fact that some couples SHOULD NOT be seen hugging in public. (You all know the type, you see them and think 'dear god future generations will suffer because of their offspring'.)
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    Don't anyone try to stop Cheffie and me from hugging!

    She's teaching me the benefits of PDA....and I'm being such a good student!
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    Originally posted by FDNY101TRUCK
    Teachers shouldnt have to but they do and if they dont then they wont have control in their classroom and the kids take advantage...so yes i do think teachers also should be doing their jobs telling kids how to act and disciplining them.
    Basic behavior is taught long before kids enter school. How is it the teacher's responsibility to teach proper behavior when some of the parents teach them just the opposite by the way they behave themselves?

    If you're going to lay that responsibility upon the teachers, two things need to be resolved though. First and foremost, how do you resolve giving teachers the expectation to do teach civility without empowering them to follow through for those that have the support of the parents for acting like thugs. Secondly, who's going to teach the class if the teacher is tied up trying to teach a few troublemakers how to behave in a civil manner?

    Originally posted by FDNY101TRUCK

    In my school it seems that the faculty and the administrators are more concernced about kids being late than they ongoing drug problem, maybe everyone just wont believe it because its oh the rich hunterdon county where no kids do anything wrong. i have gotten numerous detentions for being late which yes i know its breaking the rules but still i wish they would concentrate on the drugs that pass through this school. i remember sophomore year this girl asked i wanted to buy some coke and she pulled out the huge bag of it. i mean ive seen so many drugs go through here that the DEA would have a field day.
    They occasionally bring drug dogs into the high schools here, and you would think from some of the screams (kids AND parents) of "civil rights violations" that they were going to randomly drag kids away to the gulags. Most of the kids thought it was cool to see the dogs. The ones that squealed the loudest were the ones with the lockers where the dogs alerted. (Imagine that)

    It is often seen as a greater civil risk to the school board for drug interdiction activities than to absolve the responsibility to a law enforcement community that is already most likely understaffed, and unable to effectively work within the school buildings.

    Originally posted by FDNY101TRUCK

    well what gives a teacher the right to make fun of a student or curse at them? nothing therefore they should be held accountable for what happens if a mother wants to go all psycho on them well then im sure they deserved it.
    Where the hell did I say that it was ok to do that? Many of the parents of the problem kids see any effort of punishment for their "pookie's" behavior as being disrespectful of their child. They feel like their kid has the right to be disresepctful to the staff and even other kids as a form of expression. Making the assumption that "if a mother wants to go all psycho on them well then im sure they deserved it" is a pretty cavalier assumption to make. In fact, it's not deserved in most cases.

    I've heard that very argument used first hand more than once. One of these people was the parent of a child we were arresting for setting the freakin' school on fire. It was rapidly turning ugly until she was told she was about 2 seconds from being under arrest herself.

    Like StayBack said, there are as many bad firefighters, medics, police officers, janitors (you get the idea) as there are teachers. It's incredibly unfair to assume that all teachers (or other people) are bad because of the actions or inactions of a few. It's equally unfair to lay burdens expectations upon them that they shouldn't bear.

    Some of those teachers now seen as "bad" were very good once upon a time. They just got fed up with the BS and the lack of support needed to do their jobs.

    Much of that support has to come from the parents. I had 3 kids and tried to be active in their education. They learned what was proper behavior at home, but tried to test their limits a time or two. They soon realized the school couldn't do anything nearly as bad as what was waiting for them when they got home should they decide to act like heathens.

    I learned what they held of value, and used that to reinforce the discipline for appropriate behavior. It just really bugs me to see teachers blamed for stuff that basically isn't their responsibility. Not everything is the teacher's fault.

    I went to school in an era when you acted out, you paid the price. I got my rear end busted a time or two in school. I certainly didn't end up a serial killer. I saw in tonight's paper that my old assistant principal in high school died. He used to joke with me that he was going to have my name installed on his door since I spent nearly as much time in there as he did. I played baseball in school and used to cut study hall to take batting practice in the gym. It seems they didn't like me doing that for some reason (go figure), and we visited often. He was an educator, and he always had my respect. I regret not taking the time to thank him for what he did for me through my hs years.

    StayBack, keep the faith, buddy. Good work does not go unrecognized, nor unrewarded in some manner. It's people like you that's teaching the kids that are gonna be taking care of us all one day. Teach them well.
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