1. #1
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    FlyingKiwi's Avatar
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    Default Officers and Sergeants

    Sent to me by a Friend. Who is a Sergeant in the NZ Army.

    Shared here for all the ex and current Service people around the world.

    3 Real Life Stories

    The First …

    Eleven people were dangling below a helicopter on a rope. There were ten Officers and one Sergeant.
    Since the rope was not strong enough to hold all the eleven, they decided that one of them had to let go to save all the others.

    They could not decide who should be the volunteer. Finally the Sergeant said he would let go of the rope since Sergeants are used to doing everything. They forsake their family, don’t claim all of their expenses and do a lot of overtime without getting anything in return.

    When he finished his moving speech all the Officers began to clap…

    Moral::
    Never underestimate the powers of a Sergeant.

    The second …

    A group of Sergeants and a group of Officers take a train to a conference. Each Officer holds a ticket. But the entire group of Sergeants has bought only one ticket for a single passenger. The Officers are just shaking their heads and are secretly pleased that the arrogant Sergeants will finally get what they deserve.

    Suddenly one of the Sergeants calls out: “The conductor is coming!”. At once, all the Sergeants jump up and squeeze into one of the toilets. The conductor checks the tickets of the Officers. When he notices that the toilet is occupied he knocks on the door and says: “Ticket, please!” One of the Sergeants slides the single ticket under the doors and the conductor continues merrily on his round.

    For the return trip the Officers decide to use the same trick. They buy only one ticket for the entire group but they are baffled as they realize that the Sergeants didn’t buy any tickets at all. After a while one of the Sergeants announces again: “The conductor is coming!” Immediately all the Officers race to a toilet and lock themselves in.

    All the Sergeants leisurely walk to the other toilet. Before the last Sergeant enters the toilet, he knocks on the toilet occupied by the Officers and says: “Ticket, please".

    Moral:
    Officers like to use the methods of the Sergeants, but they don’t really understand them.

    The third …

    Once upon a time three Officers were walking through the woods and suddenly they were standing in front of a huge, wild river. But they desperately had to get to the other side. But how, with such a raging torrent? The first Officer knelt down and prayed to the Lord: “Lord, please give me the strength to cross this river! "

    *pppppfffffffuuuuffffffff*
    The Lord gave him long arms and strong legs. Now he could swim across the river. It took him about two hours and he almost drowned several times.
    BUT: he was successful!

    The second Officer, who observed this, prayed to the Lord and said: “Lord, please give me the strength AND the necessary tools to cross this river!”
    *pppppfffffffuuuuffffffff*
    The Lord gave him a tub and he managed to cross the river despite the fact that the tub almost capsized a couple of times.

    The third Officer who observed all this knelt down and prayed: “Lord, please give me the strength, the means and the intelligence to cross this river!”
    *pppppfffffffuuuuffffffff*
    The Lord converted the Officer into a Sergeant. The Sergeant took a quick glance on the map, walked a few meters upstream and crossed the bridge.

    Send this to a Sergeant so that they have something to smile about; and to the Officers if you think they can stomach the truth!
    Psychiatrists state 1 in 4 people has a mental illness.
    Look at three of your friends, if they are ok, your it.

  2. #2
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    Default

    too funny kiwi. I think i can safely assume that you were an NCO?
    "There are only two things that i know are infinite, the universe and human stupidity. And im not so sure about the former."

    For all the life of me, i cant see a firefighter going to hell. At least not for very long. We would end up putting out all the fires and annoying the devil too much.

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    Thumbs up

    Very good !

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by FlyingKiwi
    When he finished his moving speech all the Officers began to clap…
    ROTFLMAO. Only officers could do this. Just proves that education does not necessarily make one smart.

    This shall be forwarded to several friends and acquaintances. I was not a Sergeant, but I was a Corporal of Marines, and I can still appreciate it.
    "Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like." Will Rogers

    The borrower is slave to the lender. Proverbs 22:7 - Debt free since 10/5/2009.

    "No man's life, liberty, or property are safe while the legislature is in session." - New York Judge Gideon Tucker

    "As Americans we must always remember that we all have a common enemy, an enemy that is dangerous, powerful and relentless. I refer, of course, to the federal government." - Dave Barry

    www.daveramsey.com www.clarkhoward.com www.heritage.org

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    That is right on the money.

  6. #6
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    Talking

    I may have posted this one before, but it is suited to the topic at hand. My favorite from my days as a SGT.


    What do an Officer and a Lighthouse in the desert have in common?
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    They're both awfully bright, but damn near useless.

    Never argue with an Idiot. They drag you down to their level, and then beat you with experience!

    IACOJ

  7. #7
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    Yes Patty.

    Like Sharkie, I was a Corporal.

    Corporals are the real backbone of the Military, we are the ones that make the Sergeants look smart.
    Psychiatrists state 1 in 4 people has a mental illness.
    Look at three of your friends, if they are ok, your it.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by FlyingKiwi
    Yes Patty.

    Like Sharkie, I was a Corporal.

    Corporals are the real backbone of the Military, we are the ones that make the Sergeants look smart.
    EHEHHEEEEE. I'm a Master Corporal, but spent near on 12yrs as a corporal, before I "got it right"
    If you don't do it RIGHT today, when will you have time to do it over? (Hall of Fame basketball player/coach John Wooden)

    "I may be slow, but my work is poor." Chief Dave Balding, MVFD

    "Its not Rocket Science. Just use a LITTLE imagination." (Me)

    Get it up. Get it on. Get it done!

    impossible solved cotidie. miracles postulo viginti - quattuor hora animadverto

    IACOJ member: Cheers, Play safe y'all.

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