1. #1
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    Default Redneck Christmas.

    Redneck Christmas
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    I dont suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.

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    I know a few people that need that in their front yard.
    "Training doesn't make you a good fireman, fighting fire makes you a good fireman"
    http://thedarksideof911.blogspot.com/
    FTM-PTB-EGH
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    ROFLMFAO!! I think I may have seen that around here.
    Fire Marshal/Safety Officer

    IAAI-NFPA-IAFC/VCOS-Retired IAFF

    "No his mind is not for rent, to any god or government"
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    Failure is when fantasy meets reality

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    Redneck xmas part deux
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    "My friends, watch out for the little fellow with an idea." - Tommy Douglas 1961.

    Tender 9 - old, slow, ugly, cantankerous, reliable!

    All empires fall, you just have to know where to push

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    I resemble I mean resent these Redneck stereotypes.
    Whats with everybody around here picking on us poor Rednecks.
    We just got through with a thread in which I was accused of hanging that deer decoration in my yard. So someone has to bring it back up.

    Well come on, ya'll want to take on a Redneck keep 'em them pictures and jokes coming. So lets go...



    ...HEY YA'LL WATCH THIS...

    FOR HE WHO SERVES HIS FELLOWS IS OF ALL HIS FELLOWS GREATEST

    IACOJ

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    Reminds me of when I got the training manikin from the station, dressed it in civilian clothes and hung it handing from the roof, wrapped in christmas lights. Everyone kept slowing down to look. My mother drove off into a ditch. I was cussed out and threated to be beaten for some reason. Also I couldn't find out how many 911 calls the dispatch center got. Ahhh, the silly season.
    NREMT-P\ Reserve Volunteer Firefighter\Reserve Police Officer
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    You should have dressed him in a Santa suit.
    Last edited by nitsua98; 11-30-2005 at 04:40 PM.

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    Or in women's underwear under his civvies."Hey y'all,look!Randy has ithues!"

    Quote Originally Posted by nitsua98
    You should have dressed him in a Santa suit.

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    They're just jealous that they weren't taught at age 8 to field dress a deer.
    Take pity on the city dwellers.

    Quote Originally Posted by redneckemt
    I resemble I mean resent these Redneck stereotypes.
    Whats with everybody around here picking on us poor Rednecks.
    We just got through with a thread in which I was accused of hanging that deer decoration in my yard. So someone has to bring it back up.

    Well come on, ya'll want to take on a Redneck keep 'em them pictures and jokes coming. So lets go...



    ...HEY YA'LL WATCH THIS...


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    Naw, the whole point of civie clothes was to make people think it was a real person or better yet me.
    NREMT-P\ Reserve Volunteer Firefighter\Reserve Police Officer
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    I just got back from an expensive visit to Barnes & Nobel. ON my way to the cash register, I saw the bargin table. Now I know that Christmas is on the way! There were two books: one called The Redneck Night Before Christmas and the other was The Cajun Night Before Christmas. Of course I had to take a look.

    Yep uhuh
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    Quote Originally Posted by stm4710
    Redneck Christmas
    What is wrong with that?

    How about the 10 foot dia. snow globe that is out now...with snow....in front of the modular homes?

    I started to put one in front of Alan's house..
    YGBSM!
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    Quote Originally Posted by doughesson
    They're just jealous that they weren't taught at age 8 to field dress a deer.
    Take pity on the city dwellers.
    Well, I will confess.

    My son, Alex has helped me dress deer....at age 8

    Alright, go ahead and say it.....

    REDNECK
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    You know, it never fails. Every year somebody stops at a dead deer on the highway and puts a red ball on it's nose. And every year it's funny as hell.

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    Quote Originally Posted by doughesson
    They're just jealous that they weren't taught at age 8 to field dress a deer.
    Take pity on the city dwellers.

    8? I learned at five and was hunting by 8

    Who's Next
    FOR HE WHO SERVES HIS FELLOWS IS OF ALL HIS FELLOWS GREATEST

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    I don't care who y'are this thread right here is funny!
    Last edited by 66FIRE56; 12-01-2005 at 12:15 AM.

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    ROTFLMAO!!! That has GOT to be THE funniest thing I've seen in a LONG time! Now that took some creative thought...surprised I haven't seen it here.

    Also surprised no one has told the "Three wise men came from a far" joke yet.

    And just to set the record straight, in case there is any question... It's alright to be a redneck!
    IACOJ

    "And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap it if we do not lose heart."

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    Here's A Test to see if your a redneck I'm doing this from memory so here goes.

    THE FOXWORTHY TEST

    1. Have you ever misspelled something in Christmas Lights
    2. DO your Christmas Orniments double as fishing lures
    3. DO you thing the nut cracker is something you did off the high dive
    4. DO you leave your lights up all year
    5. Have you ever left Beer out for Santa
    6. Do you have to go down to the County Jail to visit your mama and or
    daddy on Christmas eve
    7. Starting in December do you put a red nose on all the dead deer
    beside the road (the ones you don't take home)
    8. Have you ever used a Christmas tree for a hunting blind
    9. Have you ever been arrested for beating someone up for making
    redneck jokes
    10. Can you relate to most of the things on this list

    (DISCALIMER: Most of these jokes are Jeff Foxworthy's the rest I either came up with or stole from a buddy)
    Last edited by redneckemt; 12-01-2005 at 09:34 AM.
    FOR HE WHO SERVES HIS FELLOWS IS OF ALL HIS FELLOWS GREATEST

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    Sorry,I grew up in Memphis.Hunting inside the city limits was and is frowned upon by the local law enforcement community for some reason.

    Quote Originally Posted by redneckemt
    8? I learned at five and was hunting by 8

    Who's Next

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    Alright, since we are on the topic of "skinnin deer", how many of you have dumpsters located around the county/parish that is dedicated for the guts?
    YGBSM!
    Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

    If all you have is a hammer, then your problems start to look like nails.
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  21. #21
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    This may not be PC... but somehow it seems appropriate to add it to this thread:

    http://www.irbykennedy.com/WhiteTrashXmas.html
    Richard Nester
    Orrville (OH) Fire Dept.

    "People don't care what you know... until they know that you care." - Scott Bolleter

  22. #22
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    Sorry... posted this twice in error... Moderator - please remove this one - Thanks!
    Last edited by MetalMedic; 12-03-2005 at 10:39 AM.

  23. #23
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    White Trash Xmas, that was hilarious!
    September 11th - Never Forget

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    Default For our Bretheren in da Bayou.

    Last night, my little family broke bread with the respected ARHANEY and family. Afterwards, we saw this set of lights and both thought of our brothers/sisters in `da bayou.

    Enjoy. We did.
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    YGBSM!
    Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

    If all you have is a hammer, then your problems start to look like nails.
    ___________________

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