Given the title, many firefighters will probably react one of two ways before choosing to read this article. You will feel your department either completely lacks respect or has got it going on.
I’m not talking about respect within the department though. I’m talking about respect towards the other person in your life. The one on the home front who takes care of all the things you miss because you chose to live and love this firefighting life. In a profession where lives can hinge on the respect and trust between people, more effort should be made to hold your special someone in high regard as well.
Don’t assume I’m speaking just to the firefighters here though. Oh, no. I’ve seen plenty of marriages turn to dust under the heavy weight of a spouse’s inflated ego too. Resentment, jealousy and mistrust follow until finally bitter hatred takes hold.
The best recommendation I have to avoid this is to get over yourselves; all of you. So you had a hard shift and the Captain caught your mistake during training and your frequent flyer called you guys five times in one shift to come check her blood pressure and it was cold washing the truck this morning. Waa. Or you had a hard day at work and the kids announced that the toilet was overflowing as you chased your Houdini dog around the neighborhood and dinner turned to charcoal in the oven. Again, waa.
Everybody has these days. Call each other, tell about your crappy day, then shut your mouth and take the time to listen. Don’t turn a phone call into a spitting contest to see who suffered the worst misery for the day. You both will lose.
Admittedly, Tradd has never been a romantic who showers me with roses or chocolates, or even compliments for that matter. But he quietly acknowledges that my actions help him do his job because he knows I can handle everything else. In turn, I handle it willingly.
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