Welcome back to The Flipside of the Firehouse. This is where we talk about what doesn't always make it into reports, policies, or training manuals. The real conversations, the tension, the leadership moments that happen in the bay and around the kitchen table. The things that actually shape a crew, for better or worse.

I want you to think about something for a minute. When was the last time you intentionally sat down with one of your firefighters, officers, or fellow leaders and had a conversation that had absolutely nothing to do with the fire department?

Not about staffing, training, or the next policy coming down from administration. I'm talking about an actual conversation. How their kids are doing. How things are going at home. What they're excited about, or maybe what's keeping them up at night.

If you have to think too hard about that answer, we probably need to talk.

Look, I get it. The fire service has never been an easy profession. We've always dealt with long hours, stressful calls, difficult personalities, and the occasional circus that comes with working in a firehouse. That's nothing new. But I would argue that the world our people are walking into today is creating a level of pressure that many of us haven't experienced before.

And as leaders, we need to recognize that.

The world doesn't stay outside the firehouse

Look around at what's happening in our country and across the world. The political climate in the United States has become increasingly divisive. Wars and international conflicts dominate the headlines. Families are dealing with rising costs for groceries, housing, insurance, and just about everything else. Communities are divided over issues that would have been difficult to imagine having such an impact on everyday relationships just a few years ago.

🎙️The Firehouse Yak: Flip Griffin – Flipping Fire Service Leadership

Now add the fire service to that equation. Our people are being asked to do learn and document more, and respond to an ever-expanding list of emergencies. Many departments are struggling with staffing and budgets. The expectations of the communities we serve keep growing, even when the resources available to meet them don't.

And somewhere in the middle of all that is a firefighter who is trying to figure out how to pay for daycare, an officer dealing with an aging parent, or a paramedic whose marriage is struggling.

Here's the part I think we sometimes forget: just because someone walks through the station doors, puts on a uniform, and shows up ready to work doesn't mean everything else in their life suddenly disappears.

In this profession, we tend to expect people to compartmentalize. Leave your problems at the door and focus on the mission to get the job done. And while there's absolutely a time and place for that mentality, particularly when lives are on the line, we can't expect people to turn off everything happening in their lives for 24 or 48 hours at a time.

Your people are human beings first and firefighters second—understanding that doesn't make you a soft leader. It makes you a better one.

People don't want to be invisible

One book I regularly bring into our Firehouse Freedom leadership workshop is Patrick Lencioni's "The Truth About Employee Engagement." In it, Lencioni identifies three major causes of workplace dissatisfaction: anonymity, irrelevance, and immeasurement.

Those might sound like business school terms, but stick with me, because they apply directly to the firehouse. Anonymity is the feeling that nobody really knows you or cares about you as a person. Irrelevance is the belief that what you do doesn't really matter to anyone. Immeasurement is the frustration of not having a meaningful way to recognize your own progress or success.

Think about how those three things show up in your department.

You have a firefighter who shows up every shift, does their job, and rarely complains. They're dependable, competent, and don't create problems. But outside of their annual evaluation, when was the last time someone in leadership actually checked on them? Or, consider the experienced captain who's spent years keeping their crew together, mentoring younger firefighters, and handling problems before they ever reach the chief's desk. Does anyone ever stop and acknowledge the difference they're making? What about the newer firefighter who's working hard to improve but has no idea whether they're meeting expectations or making progress?

All three of these people could be doing their jobs well while slowly becoming disconnected from the organization.

And here's where Lencioni's message really hits home. People need to know that they matter, that their work matters, and that they're making progress. As leaders, we have tremendous influence over all three.

But I believe anonymity is the one we need to pay particular attention to right now. Because in a world where people are already feeling overwhelmed, divided, or isolated, the last thing they need is to feel invisible inside their own firehouse.

You don't have to agree to understand

Here's something else worth discussing. Your people won't all see the world the same way you do.

They have different political beliefs, religious backgrounds, family structures, financial situations, and personal experiences. Some are deeply concerned about what's happening overseas. Others are worried about what might happen in their own communities. Some are barely paying attention to the news because they're too busy trying to keep their families afloat.

And that's okay. As a leader, your job isn't to convince everyone to see the world through your eyes. It's to understand that they're looking at the world through their own. 

You don't have to agree with someone's politics to understand that they're worried about the future. You don't have to share someone's personal beliefs to recognize that those beliefs are important to them. And you certainly don't have to have experienced the same challenges to show someone that you care.

One of the core abilities we teach in our workshop curriculum is relatability. It's the ability to connect with people through understanding, empathy, and shared experiences. Notice that I didn't say agreement. Relatability isn't about becoming everyone's best friend or abandoning your standards. It's about creating an environment where people feel comfortable being themselves, even when they don't see eye to eye.

And when people feel understood, something important starts to happen. Trust grows, communication improves and small problems get discussed before they become big ones.

That's how you begin keeping a department tight, even when the world outside seems determined to pull everyone apart.

Connection doesn't require a leadership program

One of the biggest mistakes I see leaders make is believing that improving culture requires some massive initiative. A new committee, another survey, a strategic plan, or a department-wide program with a catchy acronym. Sometimes those things have their place, but connection doesn't have to be complicated.

In fact, some of the most meaningful leadership moments happen around the kitchen table, over a cup of coffee, or while checking equipment in the apparatus bay. It's remembering that someone's daughter had a soccer tournament over the weekend and asking how it went. It's noticing that a normally outgoing firefighter has been unusually quiet and taking a moment to check on them privately. It's asking a captain how they're holding up after a difficult week, then actually listening to the answer. And sometimes it's simply recognizing that someone has been carrying a heavier load than usual and asking what you can do to help.

None of that costs the department a dime.

But there's an important distinction here. Asking someone how they're doing isn't the same as genuinely caring about the answer. Your people can tell the difference.

If every conversation feels like a leadership technique or another box you're checking, you're missing the point. Connection has to come from a genuine interest in the people you've been trusted to lead. That means remembering what they tell you. Following up when something matters. Respecting their privacy when they don't want to talk. And being willing to share a little of yourself along the way.

You don't need to know every detail of someone's personal life. You just need them to know that if something matters to them, it matters enough for you to care.

Your next shift action: Start with good news

So where do we start? I want to offer something incredibly simple that you can introduce at your very next shift or leadership meeting.

In Gino Wickman's book "Traction," he introduces the Entrepreneurial Operating System (EOS), which includes a structured weekly meeting called the Level 10 Meeting, commonly referred to as an L10.

One of the first parts of that meeting is called the Segue. It's a brief opportunity for everyone to share some personal and professional good news before diving into the business of the meeting. That's it, nothing complicated.

But think about what that could look like inside your firehouse.

Imagine starting your next shift meeting by asking everyone to share one piece of good news from their personal life and one from work. Maybe someone's kid made the honor roll. Someone finally finished a home improvement project. A firefighter passed a certification exam, or a captain shares that their crew had a great training evolution.

For a few minutes, you're not talking about call volume, staffing shortages, budget problems, or the latest complaint from administration. You're learning about each other.

Now, I know what some of you are thinking. "Flip, my crew, is going to look at me like I've lost my mind if I start asking everyone to share good news."

Maybe they will. Especially the first time. But give it a chance. Keep it short, keep it natural, and don't force anyone to share something personal they're uncomfortable discussing. Most importantly, participate yourself. Over time, those little conversations can create opportunities for connection that might never happen otherwise.

And here's another benefit. In a world where so much of what we hear is negative, you're intentionally creating a few minutes where people get to recognize something positive in their lives.

That doesn't erase their problems. It doesn't fix staffing or make groceries cheaper. But it does remind everyone sitting around that table that life is bigger than the challenges they're facing. And sometimes, that's exactly what people need.

The department needs you, but your people need you more

We spend a tremendous amount of time in the fire service preparing our people to handle emergencies. We train them to recognize hazards, make decisions under pressure, communicate effectively, and work together when everything around them is falling apart. 

But how much time do we spend making sure the people doing all that work actually feel connected to the organization and to each other? We talk constantly about brotherhood, sisterhood, family, and having each other's backs. Those are powerful words. But they only mean something when our everyday actions support them.

You can have the best apparatus, the newest equipment, and the most impressive training program in the county. But if your people don't feel valued, understood, or connected, you're building your department on a pretty shaky foundation.

And remember, connection doesn't mean lowering expectations or avoiding accountability. In fact, I believe the opposite. When people know you genuinely care about them, difficult conversations become easier because they understand where you're coming from. They know you're invested in their success, not just their performance.

So here's my challenge to every chief, captain, lieutenant, and informal leader reading this: At your next shift, slow down long enough to learn something about someone you lead. Ask a question you wouldn't normally ask. Listen a little longer than you normally would. And if you learn something important, make a point to follow up.

Then consider starting your next meeting with a few minutes of good news. Don't turn it into another administrative requirement or make it complicated. Just make it part of how you lead.

Because the world outside the firehouse isn't getting any simpler, and we can't control most of what's happening out there. But we absolutely have influence over what happens inside our own stations.

And right now, more than ever, your people need to know that someone sees them, understands them, and genuinely gives a damn about how they're doing—that someone needs to be you.

And as always…

If it creates an ah-ha moment…

If it causes you to see something differently…

Or if it is something you dismiss now but remember later when you need it…

Then it is doing its job.

That is why I am here.

That is the flipside.

Until next month.